Goodbye dear friend

My sweet friend’s battle with cancer ended last night.Β  Today she is dancing in heaven without pain or worry.Β  Pam was a fighter.Β  From the beginning she defied every time limit that her doctors gave her.Β  Most notably was the one given approximately two months ago.Β  At that time her doctors told her family sheΒ would die withinΒ one to seven days! The time in between has been a gift, for me and most importantly her family.Β  During this time those that loved her came together to help make her dream of renewing her vows with her husband come true, we laughed and cried with her.Β  But the gift was more than that, existing friendships were strengthened and new friendships were made.Β  Some of us also discovered new talents or strengths.Β  Some cleaned, some cooked, some sang, and some just held her hand, but we all had one common goal, and that was to make Pam as comfortable as possible and to

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Reasons to give Thanks

This Thanksgiving I am reminded of all that I have to be thankful for.Β  My dear friend Pam has reached her final days and for all I know today may be the last time I see her on earth.Β  I will be away for two days this week to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family at Disneyland.Β  This trip had been planned and reservations were made long before Pam entered her final weeks.Β  My first instinct after seeing her yesterday and hearing the nurse’s report was to cancel my trip, because it’s not like I can’t go to Disneyland any time that I want.Β  However, I am not canceling this trip asΒ  Pam would not want me to cancel.Β  So this trip will be in honor of Pam.Β  The past two months Pam’s situation has reminded of all that I have to be thankful for.Β  With that said, here is my list of things that I am giving thanks for this

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Recognizing when to speak and when to be silent.

Those of you that follow me know that I have been spending most of my energy and time with my dear friend that is nearing the end of her battle with cancer.Β  Read Beating the Odds to learn more about Pam, my miracle friend.Β  Since my last post, my friend has suffered a seizure that has increased her memory loss and made it even harder for her to communicate her needs. I am no stranger to death, as I have been with several people as they entered their final days, but never to this extent. Β As someone who suffers from several chronic conditions (MS, Psoriatic Arthritis, Degenerative Disc Disease, and Fibromyalgia), I find myself in a unique position of understanding and having empathy for much of my friend’s physical pain, emotional turmoil, and mental misfires.Β  I know what it is like to be consumed with physical pain.Β  I know the emotional struggle of allowing people to care for me and

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Beating the odds

I have been busier than usual for the past five weeks.Β  Because of this I haven’t had the time or energy to post as often as I would like.Β  My dear friend is dying from cancer.Β  I will be sharing Pam’s story with you in the future because there is so much we can all learn from it.Β  Long story short, she was diagnosed and told that she had 6 months to a year to live.Β  That was almost 4 years ago.Β  A month ago she took a turn for the worse and her family was told that she would die within 7 days.Β  Well, my friend is still with us, and has more lucid moments than we could have ever imagined.Β  I have been blessed that my psoriatic arthritis had gone into remission the same week it appeared my friend would leave us.Β  Since that week, I have been spending 3-4 afternoons a week with her as she is

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