Everyone likes hearing that they did a good job or that their work made someone else’s life better, right?
Sure, but when you have been continuously doubted, made fun of, or shamed because of your chronic illness, accepting a compliment isn’t so easy.
Chronic illnesses like fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis, and psoriasis to name a few do more than inflict pain upon our bodies. They also beat up our emotional health.
*Disclosure: This post includes affiliate links. Meaning that at no additional cost to you, I receive a commission when you make a purchase through my links. The proceeds earned fund the giveaways I host in my Facebook groups.
A strange thing happens when people find out that we have a chronic illness. Suddenly, they stop seeing what we are able to do and they focus intensely on what we can’t do.
I get that it may be hard to understand how doing things that we used to take for granted are now considered huge accomplishments for many of us. But that is the reality of living with chronic pain. I never gave myself a high-five for taking a shower before becoming chronically ill, but now showering and keeping up with basic hygiene is a big deal.
Personally, I do not discuss these types of accomplishments beyond my blog, because 99% of the time the responses I receive are negative.
I can’t imagine not being able to shower every day
I am so glad I am not you
These comments make it hard acknowledge what we are accomplishing and keeps us focused on what we are unable to do.
Voices in our head
After a while, those negative thoughts take on a new life inside our heads. Instead of only dealing with a few rude comments here and there, they whisper disgusting lies 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
You can’t do anything.
Why try? You will just fail.
If we are not careful, we begin to believe those lies. Once we believe them, recognizing and acknowledging our accomplishments becomes more difficult.
We begin to wonder if we can do anything right. And if something good does occur, we are unable to see or accept the contribution we made to make it happen. Especially when in regards to our health.
Pacing, following our body’s lead, modifying activities, and/or using mobility aids are things to be celebrated, not ridiculed. If doing these things allows us to do more, we win!
Learning to accept a compliment
Just because the average person doesn’t see the significance in pacing ourselves or listening to our bodies, it doesn’t mean that we didn’t work hard.
Even though I have made great strides in learning to recognize and acknowledge my triumphs in the past 7 years, I still struggle accepting compliments from others.
As a chronic illness blogger, my goal is to help others. The purpose of this site is to help those living with chronic pain find ways to live better, smarter, and with less pain. My other site, Disneyability, helps people with and without disabilities plan a magical visit to Disneyland.
I am apparently helping people or I wouldn’t receive daily messages from readers about how my advice or articles have helped them. But then the lies that play over and over again in my head say…..
It’s not you, they messaged the wrong person.
So you helped one person, too bad you can’t do this or that….
Nothing you do will ever be good enough.
In the past I used to think that just because my chronic diseases were not curable, nothing I could/would/should do would make a difference anyways. I know now that I was wrong, because the little changes I did make, made a huge difference in my life. Inability to cure myself doesn’t and shouldn’t diminish the improvements I have made. Big or small, they wouldn’t have happened had I not taken action.
I know it isn’t easy, but don’t let what others say or think about your life blind you from what you ARE able to do. So what if you have to do things differently??!! So what if you move slower than before??!! This is your journey, not theirs!
An unbelievable compliment
You may have seen my post a few weeks ago about being nominated for not one, but three WEGO Health Awards. For years I have watched fellow bloggers receive nominations and endorsements and thinking that my blog and work just wasn’t good enough. Then to my surprise, I received three nominations this year!!
I am not going to lie, it feels weird and wonderful all at the same time. I am truly appreciative to those who have nominated me. Thank you for recognizing my work!
Whether I win in one of these categories or not doesn’t matter. Knowing that someone has benefitted from my hard work is the biggest compliment I could receive. With that said, if my work has made you laugh, comforted, or helped you in any way, please take a moment to endorse one or all of my nominations.
Endorsements do not determine the winners of the awards but are a simple way to say thank you to health and wellness bloggers like myself.
After you endorse me, be sure to share some love with other nominees that have brought joy and useful information to your life! CLICK HERE TO ENDORSE NOW.