Road blocks, New groove, and Spinning my wheels

*Disclosure: I am not a medical professional and am not issuing medical advice. This post includes affiliate links. Meaning that at no additional cost to you, I receive a commission when you make a purchase through my links. The proceeds earned fund the giveaways I host in The Disabled Diva’s Fitness Buddies and Disneyability Group on Facebook.

For 13 years my chronic illnesses destroyed my dreams. 

Fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis, psoriasis, and endometriosis became road blocks. 

Because I knew no other route, I just stood there, waiting for my path to be cleared. 

The problem was that no one was going to clear it or create a new one, that was my job!

Road Blocks

For 12 years my doctors never batted an eye at treating my chronic pain with opioids.  You can imagine my shock in year 13 when all of sudden it became nearly impossible to find a doctor who was willing to help me relieve my pain. 

This road block could have and in all honesty it almost did, destroy my life.  Chronic pain, when not tended to will drive a person mad.  Truly, if you have never experienced an intense physical pain that never ended, you have no idea much control it has over us. 

My first thought was to commit suicide.  What was the point of living if my doctors weren’t going to help me?  My family was the point and why I instead reached out for help. 

It was then I realized that I had to remove the road block or make a new path.  No one was going to do it for me.

New Groove

Part of removing road blocks and creating new paths was finding a new groove. 

I had to accept that my life would never be the same.  It was necessary that I let go of the way I had been living, because let’s face it, it hadn’t been working anyways. 

I had to figure out what my abilities and disabilities were.  However, recognizing my limitations and boundaries weren’t enough, I had to practice living within them. 

It wasn’t much different than living with a budget.  If I spend more money than I earn I will go into debt and my life will become more difficult.  Same goes for living with chronic pain, I can only spend so much energy, before I bankrupt my body.

Spinning my wheels

For most of those first 13 years, I resisted using mobility aids.  Instead of embracing the fact that they allowed me to do more or recognizing that using them would preserve my energy and strength, I pushed them away… 

I hated the judgmental glances, rude comments, and the simple fact that my body wouldn’t perform the way I wanted it to.  In that 13th year I had no choice but to accept using mobility aids.  It was be pushed in a wheelchair or never leave the house…..

So instead of fighting them, I forged a friendship.

It has been 6 years since I began making radical changes to not just my pain management plan, but how I live my life.  Some might have thought that I had given up when I began embracing mobility aids and adjusting my life to my true abilities, but they would be wrong.  Because here I am six years later and I no longer need my wheelchair. 

I only need a rollator when I am going to be on my feet all day. And do you know what the best part is?  I treat all of my chronic pain naturally and alternatively. The amount of medical marijuana needed to relieve my pain has also decreased.  Can you say that about your pain management plan?

Over the next seven days, I will take you through each part of my pain management plan, because pain relief is possible.


Published by Cynthia Covert

Diagnosed in 2001 with psoriasis, followed by fibromyalgia, psoriatic arthritis, endometriosis, and later a botched hysterectomy turned her world upside down. Cynthia shares her experience, advice, and tips for how to make life with chronic pain easier and less painful.

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